i just need to stop.
that just HAS to be the solution, right?
wean myself off of him for good?
there is absolutely no way that with me graduating and him going off to madrid that him and i will work out. and this thought makes me want to cry. it makes me want to cry alot.
our lives are going in two opposite directions.
that means this is it. it really is it.
i have tried to be his friend these past few days. this past week. and he clearly wont have any of it. i'm just retarded for thinking he'd be anything different. to think that his heart would be any open to letting me just be a friend. oh, what a mess i put myself in.
AND not to mention, i just dont have anyone to really talk to about it.
my heart is breaking. my heart is broken.
i can't believe i did this to myself again. i'm such an idiot.
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